Finding the Light: A Mother’s Journey from Trauma to Healing

Author Marian Henley keeps a secret from her innocent, adopted son, whom she loves dearly. He’s her lifeline to hope, love, and second chances, and she keeps her secret for all the right reasons. She’s in her bliss as she watches the boy explore and embrace the world. How can she tell him, when he becomes an adolescent, that she’s a two-time rape victim? What will it do to his psyche? To his view of himself and other men? How can she show him that women have rights to dignity, respect, and trust without hurting their relationship or the way he perceives his burgeoning masculinity? These are the questions she explores as part of her healing process in her deeply sensitive graphic memoir, Finding the Light: A Mother’s Journey from Trauma to Healing.

First, of course, she looks at her reactions to the incidents. She recalls the way she was treated by everyone from the police to dorm mates, and the things she couldn’t process at the time,

One of the most poignant points that she makes through both words and illustrations is that she coped by dissociating. She’s pictured floating above a room, while the captions say, “I floated. And I watched. My body was just a thing down there. A random collection of cells. It had nothing to do with me.” We feel how haunted she is, and at least one in six women will identify with her specific horror, while still more will remember everything from near misses to attacks of guilt for incidents beyond their control. Henley shows us that rape is a violation of both body and soul.

Through her illustrations we literally watch Marian suffer, survive, and gradually learn to trust men again. She shows us that becoming resilient can be a process, and she gives readers hope that they can overcome whatever obstacles weigh them down.

Her pictures are drawn in black and white, showing darkness and light. They embody the struggle within her that she depicts vividly using only a few powerful words that complement the illustrations.

Professional cartoonist Marian Henley shows despair and hope, emptiness and healing, and the power of reinventing oneself after violence nearly destroyed her. Based on this book, processing the truth has set her free. It’s a brave exploration of a difficult topic and one that anyone who’s ever suffered an injustice should read.